St. Peter's Italian Church
Los Angeles

                                                                          Peace I leave with you

                                                                                                                                                                     May 26, 2019

                                                                                                                                                  Sixth Sunday of Easter

On March 3rd 2019, I received a phone call from my Provincial Superior. The call’s instructions were very assertive and concise: “you will become the Parish Administrator of St Peter’s and San Conrado immediately.” I hung up the phone, caught my breath, and realized I had a lot of other commitments to cancel. I honestly struggled with the change and never even imagined it coming. Some days I would complain, be grumpy about it, and even unload my frustrations on the other priests and seminarians that lived with me at that time. 

“Peace I leave with you”, (John 14, 26) is Jesus’s greeting in today’s Gospel. I have been a priest for twelve years and been through a lot of mission changes and assignments but this one was uncomfortable. I realized I was lacking peace and besides being dedicated to the Catholic Church since 1994, the year I entered the Missionaries of St Charles, I had not learned much about Peace. The result of the love for the Master, Jesus of Nazareth, is peace. If you trust Him and feel that He is leading you, your life is supposed to go smoothly.

But Love is a verb. Love is not a feeling; it is a verb that is shown in action. The peace within given by the Love received from the Lover Jesus Christ is supposed to be acted out. Therein, a phone call is not supposed to drive you crazy  when you are in love. But I was still making those around me pay because of my lack of inner peace. Or worse, because I was feeling disconnected from the Lover and decided to crawl in a corner to cry and complain.

Most evenings the rectory of St. Peter is empty. People come to the hall of Casa Italiana to eat and drink but not to the rectory to make appointments. The visits we receive at the rectory after 7:00 pm are mostly from the homeless. One night the door bell rand and I answered. Juan was hungry ans, after I gave him a hot plate of pasta with sausage, he handed me 52 cents. Juan said he could not pay for the food but that was his donation for a priest mass intention. He asked me if I could pray for the injustice that happen on the street and the greed of those who lavish and have forgotten about the poor people. I told Juan I would pray but I could not accept the money. He insisted that I had to take it because that is all he could contribute and wanted to contribute.

"If you loved me, you would rejoice that I am going to the Father" (John 14,28) I closed the door and stood in the kitchen. I thought about Juan and realized that I lack peace. Juan lacks clothes, a home, food, and health insurance but he has an abundance of Peace. I lavish in all the benefits of the American Dream but lack God's love. Juan still knows that God gives him Peace. I left the kitchen, went to the chapel and knelt down ashamed because I was ungrateful to my God and Savior. 

God called me to St Peter/San Conrado and I was concerned if I had time to be ready. Juan opened my eyes to the reality that I was more than ready to assume this position and in fact I have an abundance of resources. The only thin I missed at this parish was to appreciate the 52 cents of Juan's donation. So, I could stop crying like a baby, hold my tears, man up, and be present to those who have Peace in their hearts. To learn from them and to share that Peace to those who, like me, trust in their securities and properties but lack trusting God. 

So, I your Parish Administrator, pray:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace...

where there is hatred, let me sow love: where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

Fr. Leandro Fossa, cs